My little girl with her long brown hair, came running to me with flowers she had (illegally) picked at school. Sometimes when I grieve for her and cry for her, I vivid memory come to me--- a day I was sitting out in the backyard and the school bus dropped her off in front of the house.She was so happy to see me...running toward me as if I was the light of her world. I remember how my heart warmed to see my beautiful little girl that day and so many day. I did all the things for my daughter and my son that had never been done for me.When the grief overtakes me, I remember moments like those that cannot be taken away from me. I did all the things I thought good moms do--including abstaining from alcohol, my family's curse.Everyone knows a loser when they see one — that is, until they're dating one.Check out these signs that might help you figure out if you're dating a loser…Before we start, it's important to clarify what we mean by “loser.”We aren't talking about a “nerd” loser, like someone who knows all the letters in the alphabet and who has probably been plotting to kill us for years of torment in high school.Sometimes, people just don't want to look in the mirror and see the truth – kind of like how Cameron Diaz refuses to believe she is no longer her 20s (or 30s, for that matter).Girls, you'd never let your friend get behind the wheel when drunk, so don't let a loser get behind her in the bedroom.
There are more victims in the environment of the Loser than his or her partner.
I hugged them and told them I loved them everyday because my parents never did that for me. Thinking back, I realize now I must have not been there for my daughter completely with all of this on my mind. He had been my first boyfriend and we never had a real partnership or intimacy.
I could go on and on about all the things I did that I thought were being a good mother. Seeing my sister die at only 35, the sober reality of how short life really is hit me in the face like cold water. She once told me during a particularly hard time in High School "If it weren't for Joe, I'd be on drugs or pregnant." I was so happy that he took delight in listening to all of her teenage problems, give her counsel and advice.
I feel I have failed at something more important than anything else in life, motherhood. I didn't want my kids to have a drunken mother and I was the only one of my four siblings that did not succumb to alcoholism. I know she was only 9 years old when my sister died at age 35 with 3 small children. Sometimes I feel: "My daughter would rather it was me that died as little as she cares for me." When my sister died, I know I had a lot of grief and a lot of fear because the cancer that killed her runs in families and the doctors were treating me like I was a cancer waiting to happen.
I wanted them to be proud of me and I was the only one in my biological family to become a college graduate. It was a terrible time filled with fright and grief.